Thursday, October 23, 2014

Relaxation... Or Not! Fifty Shades of What???

Hey, it's me... your favorite sex addict schizophrenic rock star, Dane Bainbridge... at least I hope I am your favorite. I've been writing this blog thing for a few months now and I am not really sure if anyone's reading it, which is okay because I have turned this into my personal diary and reveal things I don't think I would want the media to find out. They have enough of a field day with my "schizophrenia" as they call it.

Here is today's topic.... sex. Oh, what a surprise. Yes, I am drinking. Of course I am. I am not on tour right now, so what else is there to do (and even when I am on tour, what else is there to do? Don't answer that!)

Actually, when I came home from tour I met this girl named Katrina at the store (Yeah, I did her... hard. LOL)... anyway, we were lying in bed and she kept talking about this novel called "Fifty Shades of Grey." She wanted to do some pretty kinky stuff based on this book.  I am not really the kinky type, except for a few safe "excursions" here and there.  I had never heard of this book so I didn't know what it all meant. After she left, I decided to go and buy this book. I have read, I think, the first 2 chapters and I am bored already!!  I will give it a bit more time to get better. How exciting!  This Christian Gray fella sounds like a real control freak loser if you ask me. What girl with any self worth would put herself in such a position to be dominated in such a way?  Hey, I may be addicted to sex of all types, but it has to be completely mutual. And no tie downs unless the girl asks for it specifically. I'm a horse guy... tie downs are for horses, and not in a sexual way.

I don't know... I am a sex addict, but the romantic type. Katrina wanted to try some things she read in that infernal novel. I let her have her way a bit here and there, but I drew the line at gagging and whipping... with real whips.

What do my fans think of all this? Have they read this book? Do they think it is over the top or do they like it? Let me know.

By the way, if you're really hot... I like in Aiken, SC, toward the south-west edge of Hitchcock Wood. :-)    Just look for the Gothic Revival mansion with a spider web wrought iron gate, long drive, and a stable out back.

Friday, October 17, 2014

Uh... New Tour Bus?

I was informed today that Bruce is selling our existing tour bus (he makes these decisions and never consults with the rest of us) and ordering a new, state of the art, personalized rig.I am starting to worry about his use of our money! Except he's always been really good about making sure we have enough of everything. He works exclusively with our managers and accountants. Me, I have no money sense. I get paid, I am happy. My "paycheck" covers my expansive estate, my cars, my animals, keeps food on my table and pays for my help. What more can a man ask for? OK, sex. But I get plenty of that... yeah, can always have more!

Well, apparently, according to Bruce, this new bus will be much more comfortable for the 4 of us. It has 3 sliders, so when parked it's like this mini house! Something like 900 square feet or some such. Doesn't sound all that big to me, but bigger than the one we have used for the last 5 years. This new bus has better sleeping quarters too. Only 4 bunks instead of 6. So more space per bunk. Cool. He said we will each have a nice TV screen with DVD and satellite in each bunk, plus hook ups for anything we need to plug in (computers and such... get your mind out of the gutter). Good... plenty of room for TWO, if you get my meaning.  Okay, all you gorgeous brunettes.... come see me in my bunk. You can line up one by one or two by two... I can take it! Hah!

Bruce told me he ALMOST had a private bedroom built at the rear of the bus for himself and his wife!  That would leave the rest of us with bunks, not bedrooms. He said since we are all single and he is not, and he is older than we are, it made sense. (Bruce logic) He also knew we'd be pissed off if he did this. If we have to sleep in bunks, he does! At least they're bigger, though... and he said the mattresses are made to fit our sleep requirements (I need a super soft mattress where Stephan  prefers a bit firmer). It's almost like "Sleep Number" for bunks. hahahaha

Anyway, he placed a nice lounge in the back with a huge TV and very comfy seating. He knows I love movies and hate leather, so the sofas are of a fine suede rather than cold leather, and the TV is huge with every station known to man!! I should kiss Bruce! Tours will be much more fun.

Of course, for him, he added a separate area for composing and working and even recording. He is such a workaholic, I don't know how Caitlyn deals with him! Well, she is expecting their first child, so I guess she has no choice.

Ok... more photos for the fans..... (though I still don't know who Adrian's fans are... he's so "mysterious."  Any fans out there know what his deal is? Please tell the rest of us. Inquiring minds want to know).
Stephan enjoys playing it up for European Photo shoots....

As does Adrian... Showing off his androgyny.

Bruce, Candid

Enjoy your weekend, fans and folks......

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Home for Now

We arrived home to a deluge of rain and storms. Fortunately, my property didn't receive any damage, other than a small tree down by the barn. I guess farther west they weren't so lucky. I saw on the news about tornadoes killing people and damaging storms. I admit that's always been a fear of mine since moving south--they do tend to have much more severe weather down here than I ever remember from growing up in New England.

Anyway, it is nice to be home where I have only 2 mirrors in the whole house, very little worries, where Edna makes all my favorite foods, and I can go for midnight rides on my horse or cuddle in front of the television with one of my cats and my dog.

I am heading to my jacuzzi now for a nice long bath and spa, hoping that will kill this jet lag and allow me to get some shut eye.

A few tour shots.... Enjoy!

Me (night in Spain)

Stephan reheasing
Adrian... just being himself
Bruce caught unawares

Have a great night. Stay safe!

Thursday, October 9, 2014

Exotic Greece

Finishing up the European "shirtless" tour. Only three more gigs, Greece, Portugal and Spain. Actually, we are in Greece Oia Santorini, a luxury cave pool at the Superior Suites. You have to come here and see this. Photos do not do it justice. Just a tiny vaca here... before we head to the Athens for our gig then we are off to Spain.

Greece is one of my all time favorite locations, so I always try to let our booking manager know to allow an extra day or two when we tour here so I may have my relaxation time in one of the gorgeous hotels on the islands. I rent a yacht and sip champagne while getting my tan and enjoying the beautiful weather, perusing these magnificent islands.

Ok, this post is sounding like an ad for a travel brochure. But I really cannot say enough about Greece. Though I do wish I had someone special to share it with... oh sure, there's plenty of women, but to have someone... one special someone...! Oh who am I kidding? I am not exactly known nor loved for my witty banter or fun personality. I drink a lot, I swear and I sleep with every woman who will have me ( provided she's hot). Not exactly relationship material, which is why Jess left I am sure.

So, before we get back to sound checks, tune ups, vocal exercises (for me), rehearsals of songs we've played a million times and hear in our sleep, figuring out set lists and dealing with the media, I am going to enjoy this time out! Thus far, no one has recognized me. I've been taking my daily swim...we all have... a great time to just rest before chaos once again reigns!

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

The Gullibility of Humans!

So, while touring this area, including Romania, we visited a small village in Serbia that is proported haunted by a famous vampire. According to the tales,

villagers in the tiny western Serbian hamlet of Zarozje, nestled between lush green mountain slopes and spooky thick forests. They say rumors that a legendary vampire ghost has awakened are spreading fear — and a potential tourist opportunity — through the remote village
"The story of Sava Savanovic is a legend, but strange things did occur in these parts back in the old days," said 55-year-old housewife Milka Prokic, holding a string of garlic in one hand and a large wooden stake in another, as an appropriately moody mist rose above the surrounding hills. "We have inherited this legend from our ancestors, and we keep it alive for the younger generations."
Vampire legends have played a prominent part in the Balkans for centuries — most prominently Dracula from Romania's Transylvania region. In the 18th century, the legends sometimes triggered mass hysteria and even public executions of those accused of being vampires.
Sava Savanovic, described by the Zarozje villagers as Serbia's first vampire, reputedly drank the blood of those who came to the small shack in the dense oak tree forest to mill their grain on the clear mountain Rogatica river.
The wooden mill collapsed a few months ago — allegedly angering the vampire, who is now looking for a new place to hang his cape.
Some locals claim they can hear steps cracking dry forest leaves and strange sounds coming from the rocky mountain peaks where the vampire was purportedly killed with a sharp stake that pierced his heart — but managed to survive in spirit as a butterfly. 

Darko Vojinovic/AP

The legend of Sava Savanovic has been passed down over many generations in Zarozje, Serbia.

Personally, I am amazed at how gullible people can be (no offense).... believing in things that just are not there! Like religion and God and Angels and ghosts and all that stuff people need so badly to believe in that their mind actually sees and believes!!! I guess if that's what they need to believe to get through their day.... There have been times I wish I could believe in God again... I was raised Roman Catholic, and brainwashed into believing in what I now see as a cult. But, I got out. I thought for myself. I looked at the cold, hard facts of life. And I realized it's just us and nothing more!

Sorry if this goes against your beliefs. Not my intention to insult anyone. If it gets you through your day, then fine.  And for sure vampires do NOT exist!! I mean, really... Bram Stoker, Anne Rice, etc.  The famous authors made up these creatures based on myths. Just fiction!

I must say I am fascinated by all sorts of culture, history and beliefs. Even if it makes no sense!

Saturday, October 4, 2014

Romania--Home for Adrian

We are in Romania now. I tease Adrian all the time, since this is his home. Perhaps I will get to the bottom of his "deal."   As anyone who has followed the band knows, we have always wondered about Adrian.  He is so androgynous in appearance and mysterious about his personal life.  We've played the usual pranks on him... anything to get him to reveal what the hell he is. I mean, yeah he's male, but what's his deal? We think he's like into everything... men, women, B&D, S&M and all the other letters associated with anything kinky.

We're not sure if Adrian is straight, gay, bi or anything in between or around!

The problem is that Adrian has never showed even the slightest hint, even in 10 years, as to what he is... No girlfriends that we know of, no boyfriends. No... nothing. Is there a way to find out what's behind this mysterious drummer?

Stephan and I have been having quite a bit of fun out here in what we call "Dracula land" ... of course Adrian doesn't like that. He is Romanian after all, born here, left for the USA at age 14. It's funny... his accent gets stronger every time we get here. I hear him speaking his native language to locals (of course I can't understand one word) and though when he is on tour or in the United States, his accent is barely noticeable, but here he sounds like a vampire of olde, "Good Evening..." (think Dracula). I think he lets his guard down when he is home.

Stephan warming up before a gig.
"Bună ziua" That is Welcome in Romanian. That's about all I know, other than how to ask for wine.