This is Stephan. Many Strange Happenings.

I feel like I have taken Dane's life! Living in his home, watching his television, dealing with his help, giving attention to his pets... even doing his women! I didn't think our lives were this different until now. But, he has lived in a whole other world. I live on the coast. My home is big but smaller than this one.... I have no pets. I have a maid service that comes once a week, but no daily maids. Dane takes his fame and fortune to the ultimate limits.

I found this photo of Adrian from several years back... we did a bit of a Goth thing if yoou recall, awhile back. Adrian looked the part pretty well....

Adrian during our Goth period...

Okay, enough of this... Because of Dane's disappearance, the media are digging, coming up with all sorts of crazy ideas of their own. I found this online today... a photo of Dane having sex! No one ever photographed ME screwing! Well.... maybe that's a good thing, but for Dane it's a brag moment. He likes those... not in a bad way! Someone made this GIF....

Someone found, or captured, some video of Dane with a fan....

I seriously doubt you'll find me on any of these... Being the bass player has its advantages in that we tend to be more obscure! Lead singers and guitarists are at the forefront of the media's attentions. The strange thing is, at the moment of this video, at least, Dane was having a really good time.... where is he now, and is he having as good a time?

Ok, don't look at that video gif too long... it will give you a headache!

I also found this online. Not being able to work much with the band is giving me far too much time on my hands, I think.

I guess, according to this, I am doing quite well, as my hair now is waist-length.

No other fans have shown up since Dalia. So, my sex life is a bit slow at the moment.

But, this is Dane's blog and I am sure you do not want to hear of my prowess. But I have nothing else to offer...Dane is still missing! There's been NO leads. I will keep you informed on every tiny detail, even if it's sex pictures that pop up on the internet. I've been drinking Dane's booze. Does it show?

Something strange happened today! A clue to Dane's disappearance?

Hello. This is Stephan Gale again. I am staying at Dane's mansion until there is some word of his whereabouts. His housekeeper Edna is here each day, doing her part, though I feel bad because Dane is not here to pay her. And so I offered to pay her wages until Dane returns. There have been no charges on his credit cards, nothing. The bank said he made no unusual withdrawals before he disappeared. If he had run away with this girl as the authorities claim, he would have needed money.

Anyway, it has been a cold and rainy day here in SC. I was lying in the den, watching television earlier today, when the dog started to bark. Dane's dog, Wolfe, is a very sweet Doberman with brain damage sustained as a puppy. He does not bark unless there's a real reason to.

Dane has these security cameras all over the place, so I started to check them. That's when I saw her--some girl was standing outside in the rain, outside the gate. It was dark, the reporters have all but left us alone by now. Who is this chick? I thought. I know Dane has women showing up at his house all the time. Usually he lets them in for sex, drinks and sometimes a smoke or two, but with him gone, I wasn't sure what to do. If she's a fan, she must know he is gone. As it happens, my curiosity got the best of me.

I didn't open the gate, but went out into the drizzle. I don't think she knew who I was, as I had on a jacket and hood. She must have thought I was Dane. Though she was wearing a long rain coat, her black hair was soaked and hung down her back. Her brown eyes grew really wide and she started ranting "Oh my God Oh my God... Dane... I am so sorry about last time we were together! Please give me another chance," she rambled. "I thought you were missing, but I knew you would be here. Please, let me in, let me explain..."

At that point I removed my hood, which freed my long red hair. You should have seen the look on her face when she realized I was not Dane. Her mouth dropped open and I thought she was going to collapse onto the wet pavement. She began to stutter, "Y-You... y-you're not... um...you're Stephan, aren't you... the bass guitarist for Dark Myst?"

I tried to remain calm and neutral. "I am. May I help you with something?"

"Um...I eh... I'm Dalia. I was here, um.... in December. Dane and I...we... well, we.... Is he back yet?"

Ohhh I got it. Another of Dane's conquests, back for more. Or so I thought at the time. "No, Dalia, he is not. I'm staying here for now."

"Oh, I see. Oh, I thought... I've been coming by. I saw the lights on, I mean... the lights have been on, but the reporters are gone now and it's night and I thought--"

"You thought wrong, Dalia. Dane is not back yet." I know I sounded defensive.

I thought she would leave at that, but she didn't. "I have something for him," she said as she pulled a wrinkled envelope from the small purse on her shoulder.

"What's that?" I asked.

"A gift... an apology, for last time."

Now I was intrigued. An apology? For what? Could this random fan not be so random? Could she have information on Dane's whereabouts and not even know it? I thought hard, then decided I needed to speak to her, question her. "Do you want to come in, Dalia?"

She nodded really fast.

Once in the house, Wolfe, Dane's Doberman, greeted her like an old friend. Not that that really meant anything. The dog loves everyone!! He's not much of a protector, he's a pet. Dalia patted him and called him by name. She said it was nice to see him again. She also seemed to know the house well, so she had definitely been here before. She walked into the parlor and looked around, not in the way people look when they are curious or browsing, but like she was looking for something. So, I decided to ask her.

"You lookin for something in particular?"

"Sort of, I guess. I should know better, after what happened." She kept looking around the room, the fireplace, the sofas, the piano, everywhere.

"What are you lookin for?" I asked.

"Well... I gave him a card last time I was here. I was hoping... I guess I was hoping he still had it."

Ah. What I didn't, and wouldn't, tell her was that Dane had a habit of collecting "trophies" as he called them, from women he slept with. If she had given him a card and it was not here, chances are she either stunk as a lay, or they never did it. "The maid probably threw it away," I told her. There were a few little trinkets about that I knew were Dane's "trophies" from past fans he had over and slept with, but they were less in the form of cards, and more in the form of silver or crystal knick knacks. Dane had expensive taste. If she had given him just a card and been a good lay, the card would have lasted a month at best. "When did you see Dane last?" I asked.

Dalia thought for a moment. "Uh, it was the 23rd, I think."

Hmmm. Bruce had mentioned to the police something about a fan Dane told him about, who had shown up that day (Dec. 23rd) with a gift, but he had not kept it. By that time, the card had been long gone and no one knew her name. And now, here she was and I felt it my duty to play detective. The police felt she was unimportant since Bruce and Caitlyn saw him after she did, and Dane was fine when they left. Something was missing, however. Something I could perhaps find out from this Dalia chick. Perhaps I could do what the police failed; find Dane!

"Tell me everything that happened that day," I said, feeling suddenly like a cop in a mystery novel.

"Why?" she asked.

People in mystery novels weren't supposed to ask why, they were supposed to just answer. "It might help find Dane," I said honestly.

"Um, ok..." she started. The envelope she held in her hand was spattered with rain, and she placed it on the top of the piano. I assumed it was another card for Dane. I looked at her expectantly, waiting for her story. "I came here to see Dane. Well, you know that. But, I gave him a card... a different card than this one," she motioned to the damp envelope. I nodded. C'mon, girl, get to something I can use here!  She continued, "We um... we... well, you know... started to get into it. But he stopped so suddenly. We were so close." She bit her lip and sat on the piano bench, her legs slightly parted. She was wearing a really short skirt!  I had to look away or else I would have finished wherever it was Dane left off!

"Okay," I said, unable for a moment to think. "Why did he stop?"

"I don't know!" she drawled (she was obviously from Georgia). "He was looking past me--towards that big mirror in his bedroom. I didn't see anything, but he just stopped, ya know. Then he said I had to go!" She shrugged. "I was fit to be tied, if ya get my meanin' but I left anyway. That was all. I went home."

Not much information to go on. I was very disappointed. But, I know Dane. We've been close friends for the past decade and I cannot imagine him stopping once he's started on one of his conquests, as he calls them. Not unless something major happened. She said he looked toward the mirror. And stopped. WTF??? I KNOW Dane has a problem with mirrors because he has said in the past that he sees funky things in them, but..... what could he have seen that would stop him from having sex????

I am just as lost now as I was before. No information to give police. I'll have to see if Bruce or Adrian have any information.

Anyway, I think Dalia saw my disappointment. She came over and actually SAT on my lap!! She said she felt bad about Dane and just started kissing me. What was I going to do, push her off? Let's just say I finished what Dane had started. haha.  Wonder if I should tell him when he returns? It is his velvet sofa after all. I guess I wont have to tell him. He will see this blog. I figure, if he is somewhere he can see this, he will get angry and contact me!!! Either way, it's a win win for me.

Talk About a Buzzkill!

What a day! I was up super early because I had one HELL of a nightmare last night. I don't even want to talk about it!

The entire day I felt like a zombie... or a Walker, if you watch the Walking Dead. Have you ever had a really terrible dream that refused to let go of you all the next day? The rain did not help! Around noon sometime Wolfe barked and my cat jumped off my lap. To be honest, I didn't even know he was ON my lap! I was that out of it! Maybe I am still exhausted, as the doctor had said?

I went over to the monitor to see who dared disturb my misery. Some chick was outside my gate. She was quite attractive... black hair, busty, long legs. Yep! So, I opened the gate!  It was time to get my ass out of the slump. A good roll in the sack is always a pick-me-up.

Her name was Dalia... a Georgia peach! Lovely. She'd brought with her a gift for me, a get well card with a poem inside she had written. It was all about this love she felt for me. Yeah yeah... they all do. I got her a glass of wine. Just the thing to warm her up on this chilly and wet winter day.

As it turned out, she didn't need much warming up. She wasted NO time in finding her way into my jeans. Oh yeah! There's was only one major problem! She wanted to be in my bedroom... on my bureau... the one with the huge antique mirror! WTF.

My favorite opera was playing... (Yes, I like certain operas)... Carl Orff's Carmina Burana. I somehow feel I can relate to this opera.  The words, man... it's CRAZY! If you know archaic Latin you will get it!

“O Fortuna, velut luna, statu variabilis, semper crescis, aut decrescis, vita detestabilis, nunc obdurate, et tunc curat, ludo mentis aciem, egestatem, potestatem, dissolvit ut glaciem, Sors immanis.”

O Fortune, Like the moon, You are changeable, Ever waxing, Ever waning, Hateful life, First oppresses, And then it soothes, As fancy takes it. Poverty. And power, It melts them like ice.”

And not just the first act, either. Listen to that entire opera. It's powerful!

That ended and the Scorpion's "Rock You Like a Hurricane" pounded through the mansion. Have you ever banged during that song? I have written several songs with the same power-beat, but that song is the king of all sex music!

I had Dalia's ass on the dresser, I was so close...her warmth was right there!!!  Then You-Know-Who had to arrive just in time! Yep The Mirror Lady killed my boner! Talk about a buzzkill. Hadn't she tortured me enough by showing up onstage and killing our tour???  WHY CAN'T SHE JUST FUCKING GO AWAY???!!! Ok, big breath.

Dalia wasn't exactly happy. That was it. The end of any amourous encounter today. Sucks! I had to escort her out without explanation. This is frustrating. These illusions are destroying my sex life! Maybe I need to get on some sort of medication or something!!

After that, several drinks were in perfect order! Vodka... Rum... Wine.... anything I could find. I'm still messed up, but at least the alcohol kills the reality of what has happened--of my LIFE!

Merry fucking Christmas, Dane!!

For our fans, always a few tour pics, though the tour was cut short, I try not to disappoint.

Bruce looks like hell. He's all worried about his wife!

Adrian relaxing on the bus.

I am Not a Chick Drink Drunk!

Today was one of those days we call a "band business" day. That's a day when all we do is... well, band business. We're getting our shit together for the tour.

Sitting in the studio, waiting, I had my bottle of red wine and a glass. Hey, what the fuck's wrong with pouring into a glass? Is it more "manly" to drink from a bottle?  I used to drink rum and flavored vodka.... But when I couldn't get my pert ass out of bed to get to rehearsals and sound checks, I switched to wines. I have a wicked sweet tooth anyway and I have enough sweet wines to hold me day by day.

Adrian was drinking some concoction of Bailey's and Schnapps.

So, Bruce tells me I'm a "chick drink drunk" because I drink wine. Shit... I prefer to see it as a higher class of the male species! Of course he said nothing to Adrian... the guy's prettier than many of my fucks anyway!!  So I guess it's ok he drinks girl drinks.

One of these days I am going to lay Bruce flat if he keeps it up. I knew he was only teasing to release tension. His wife is dangerously close to her due date (which is around New Years) and we're leaving again. I felt we should postpone this tour until after the baby is born, but hey, what do I know? The new album is selling well, and he wants to get out there to make sure we stay chart toppers. He and the managers are boss!

Adrian caught in the limo. Hmm what's he thinking?

Two weeks left until the tour. The buses are getting all their safety and maintenance checks, as are the trucks that haul our stage sets and equipment.

Completely off topic, but I have develop some weird rash on my hand. Just my left hand so get your minds out of the gutter! It's mostly on my fingers, but itches so badly, I have managed to scratch the skin off without thought to what I was doing.

Of course, Edna, my ever loyal housemaid and caretaker, put some sort of voodoo on it... I don't know... she is originally from Louisiana and she called it a "home remedy," but seems like a voodoo potion to me. As long as it doesn't turn me into a frog, I'm ok. HAHA!   That's funny. Of course I do not believe in voodoo or curses, or any of that!

Although, I was cursed by a hearse once. No shit! I parked beside a big hearse once, thought nothing of it, even took a photo. For the whole next day everything went wrong!!! I called it the Curse of the Hearse.

Cursed Hearse

Ok, early morning. More "band business" tomorrow.

Night all, my fans! Sleep well and have lots of sex!

How would you like to wake up to this...

Not my photo. I woke up to similar. I think I was set up!

I woke about 2 in the afternoon in one of Stephan's spare bedrooms with 2 girls in my bed. I said I was done with sex for the night, but Stephan had all these crazy cocktail concoctions and a game that is something like spin the bottle, but it didn't include the bottle and there wasn't any spinning other than my head! And then of course there was plenty of drugs to go around, though I swear I do nothing heavier than a joint or two.

The whole place was loaded with every kind of drink and smoke and snort any human can do, though I rarely understand most of it. Sex is enough of a high. And I'm a high class wine kinda guy. Maybe a bit of weed. I have never done coke (not the soft drink) or anything heavier. Nothing that can create hallucinations... Hell, any guy who sees what I have seen all my life can't afford to have hallucinations.

I also woke to a raging headache. Since I had driven myself rather than taking the limo, I drove home with my darkest shades, popping Advil straight out of the bottle. I was so exhausted by the time I arrived home, I think I only gave a mere grunt in Edna's direction before heading upstairs and passing out on my bed.

I woke again at 7pm feeling better. So, I showered, ordered Chinese food in-house, and parked my sorry ass in front of the 60" TV in the den with a fire going. It's a fairly chilly 40 some-odd degrees. Of course, back home in CT, this is nice weather. But I have been in SC so long it's downright colder than a witch's tit!

At 1:30am now I am feeling ok. I accented my food with 2 bottles of wine. Reisling and Moscato. A little sweetness with Chinese food is great. Absolutely perfect choice!

I am alone now, other than my pets. Edna went home. All the other help is gone. Horses are snug in their stalls.  My dog is at my feet... cats all sleeping anywhere in the house there's a nice soft spot. It's a relaxed and cozy night. Going to allow myself to fall asleep in front of the TV.

Night all!!!

New Book Store, Life on the Road and Sex

Sex always gets people reading. I can't blame them. It's the greatest thing on earth. But y'a ll already know who I am and that, besides music, my next biggest hobby is sex.

And I love to read. Especially history books. Well, tomorrow is the grand opening of a new music and bookstore here in S.C. (despite the bad weather of late. T-Storms today, lots of flash flood warnings). It also happens to be the release date of Dark Myst's new CD. I plan to visit the store for some new books. With a few tour dates coming up,  I will need some reading material. The others get on my ass about the amount of books I bring on the bus, but I have not embraced those 21st century e-readers yet.

This will be a complete bus tour.  It is short--a continuation of the summer's tour--only a month and a half.  I am not crazy about spending over a month on the road, new city EVERY night, not having a decent bath at a hotel. But, we won't have time for hotels in this particular tour. It's the bus all the way. Since Bruce made sure we have a brand new bus for just the four of us, I am hoping he also ordered a decent shower. I prefer baths, but one cannot be picky on the road.

Buses can have luxuries. Showers are rarely good. 

I miss home, I miss my animals, but look forward to traveling. Sometimes I get more rest on the road than I do at home. When home it's all work, recording, getting everything ready, marketing, etc. On the road, it's mostly sitting around while driving from state to state, watching movies, reading, talking, planning and playing games. You'd be surprised how much silence there can be with just the four of us on one bus. We are often engrossed in our own interests, warming up, going over songs, writing songs, texting (the others more than me), watching movies and reading (that would be me).

I spend a lot of time in my bunk, getting rest. I like to relax in there in private, curtain closed, and read or watch a movie. Or take a nap. I like to be very prepared and awake, but the drone of the road makes me tired.

Since Bruce banned fans on our bus while moving, I have to get in what I can when I can in my bunk. Not always a comfortable situation. But sex anywhere is better than none. I do prefer hotels.

Our new bus has many comforts and luxuries we didn't have before, so I am rather excited to travel in it. I have not even seen it yet. I guess there's a nice lounge in the back with a big HDTV and all the stations we could want. Good. I like to watch fantasy movies and certain TV shows. I am not a big fan of "reality TV" except this show called "My Cat From Hell" with this interesting character, who claims to be a musician by night and a cat behaviorist by day!

Well, off to bed. I have a song to finish that Bruce wants to put on the set list for the tour. I have a few changes I have to remember to the rider as well (for those who are confused, the rider is a list of those things we band members want on the road... food and such).

Check us out on tour!!!

Uh... New Tour Bus?

I was informed today that Bruce is selling our existing tour bus (he makes these decisions and never consults with the rest of us) and ordering a new, state of the art, personalized rig.I am starting to worry about his use of our money! Except he's always been really good about making sure we have enough of everything. He works exclusively with our managers and accountants. Me, I have no money sense. I get paid, I am happy. My "paycheck" covers my expansive estate, my cars, my animals, keeps food on my table and pays for my help. What more can a man ask for? OK, sex. But I get plenty of that... yeah, can always have more!

Well, apparently, according to Bruce, this new bus will be much more comfortable for the 4 of us. It has 3 sliders, so when parked it's like this mini house! Something like 900 square feet or some such. Doesn't sound all that big to me, but bigger than the one we have used for the last 5 years. This new bus has better sleeping quarters too. Only 4 bunks instead of 6. So more space per bunk. Cool. He said we will each have a nice TV screen with DVD and satellite in each bunk, plus hook ups for anything we need to plug in (computers and such... get your mind out of the gutter). Good... plenty of room for TWO, if you get my meaning.  Okay, all you gorgeous brunettes.... come see me in my bunk. You can line up one by one or two by two... I can take it! Hah!

Bruce told me he ALMOST had a private bedroom built at the rear of the bus for himself and his wife!  That would leave the rest of us with bunks, not bedrooms. He said since we are all single and he is not, and he is older than we are, it made sense. (Bruce logic) He also knew we'd be pissed off if he did this. If we have to sleep in bunks, he does! At least they're bigger, though... and he said the mattresses are made to fit our sleep requirements (I need a super soft mattress where Stephan  prefers a bit firmer). It's almost like "Sleep Number" for bunks. hahahaha

Anyway, he placed a nice lounge in the back with a huge TV and very comfy seating. He knows I love movies and hate leather, so the sofas are of a fine suede rather than cold leather, and the TV is huge with every station known to man!! I should kiss Bruce! Tours will be much more fun.

Of course, for him, he added a separate area for composing and working and even recording. He is such a workaholic, I don't know how Caitlyn deals with him! Well, she is expecting their first child, so I guess she has no choice.

Ok... more photos for the fans..... (though I still don't know who Adrian's fans are... he's so "mysterious."  Any fans out there know what his deal is? Please tell the rest of us. Inquiring minds want to know).

Stephan enjoys playing it up for European Photo shoots....

As does Adrian... Showing off his androgyny.

Bruce, Candid

Enjoy your weekend, fans and folks......

Belgian Beauties

We're in Belgium now, half way through our European tour. I absolutely love Belgian women. They come in all different shapes, sizes, colors and flavors. Yum. Nothing like waking up to one of those.

On the other hand.... I have a bottle of wine. No, seriously.... My hotel room has these big mirrors, and everyone knows I try to avoid them as much as possible... in case I see "her."  No, not HER in the photo above (she was fun to SEE)... her!  The Mirror Lady.  Yes, I am insane... so arrest me for it already, but stop talking about it. The media has so much fun with it, so I play around with them. 

(media) "It is rumored that you're schizophrenic."

"Yes, I see a woman... No, I am not schizo."

"Does she follow you around?"

"I'm a rock star... women follow me everywhere.."

Silence. And then... 

"But those women are real. Do you see fake women?"

"Every time I go into a clothing store. They model clothing."

Flushed. "No, I meant women who are not really there."

"In a clothing store? I think Tinkerbell goes to the doll section to get her knickers."

Sighing, "Mr. Bainbridge, why do you hate mirrors?"

"Because they reflect images."

(by this time the reporter is so off his or her roster, they just ask whatever comes to mind). "So...um... you see the image of women in mirrors?"

"If there are women at parties, and there are mirrors, and I look, I see them."

"But... don't you see women in mirrors that are not there?"

"It's very difficult to see anyone in a mirror if the mirror is not there."

(by this time they've discovered their mistake)

"Err..Um... I meant do you see women that are not really there reflected in mirrors?"

"Not women, no."

"Men?"

"Just myself."

"One woman?"

"I love all women! As long as they're gorgeous and will sleep with me..!"

Usually, around this point, they start talking music and about the band..! hahaha

Don't you hate when you sleep with some gorgeous fashion model and she snaps a photo as you wake up?

Next up on the tour... Austria! Who will be my conquest there?

Heartbreak!

Jessica left me tonight!  I feel such an ache in my heart yet I understand her reasons for doing so... Such a terrible day! The band's been arguing, so much going on before our tour.... Then I come home to catch her with a man. She said he was her cousin! Yeah right. Without saying a word, I walked away and went upstairs. Jessica came up a short time later.

        “What's wrong?” she asked calmly.

        “Where is he?" I sat on the bed, staring at the door.

         “He left. I told him we needed to talk.”

         “There's nothing to say!”

        She approached me and sat about two feet away. "Dane, I’ve never seen you like this."

        I stood quickly and turned to her. “And I've never seen you with another man before!”

        She rose as well. "I told you he was my cousin. You don't believe me?"

        "Frankly. No!”

        “How dare you!” she screamed in my face. “This coming from a man who screws every woman he meets!”

What sucks most? I slapped her. I've never hit a woman and never fathomed it.

 She left a note on my mirror, the mirror in my bedroom on the antique bureau.... I am feeling so confused right now, and the 3 bottles of wine I have consumed in the last hour have taken their toll. The note is an enigma; something about looking beyond the mirror to see who I really am. Whatever that means!

Perhaps she was tired of my "Mirror Lady," whom I have seen several times this month! Perhaps it was the women she has found photos and videos of... ones recently "conquered," as I call it? What do I do now? Did I love her? I can't answer that question. Life is very complicated. Relationships even more so!

So many question, so few answers. I lose myself in wine and music now!

September 1st we go to Europe to start the next leg of our tour. Then, back to the USA in November for a few more gigs. Home at the end of December. Hopefully, this will keep my mind off Jess.

Funny thing is, here I am, world renowned, famous rock star, women want me, yet I have never felt more alone. Having delusions my entire life (that have yet to be diagnosed despite all the best therapists) doesn't help. The note Jess left me... all about mirrors, about the "Mirror Lady" and about seeing myself. I keep reading it, trying to understand what it all means.

I read about the suicide of comedian Robin Williams. He was one of my favorite comedic actors. Now I feel as if I understand why he killed himself!  I have my music, but where is it going? I have all the money I could ever want or need! I have done it all at a young age, but what do I really have? Meaningless sexcapades? Now, no one waiting for me to come home! I fear gazing into any mirror.... she confuses me. Yet I feel deeply. Something is there! She's a mere delusion. Nothing! A figment of my messed up mind.

I've been having nightmares lately... the few times I do sleep. Usually I am struggling in them, on the edge of death yet somehow hanging on! Yet I wake wondering. Why hang on? Life is too confusing! But I won't give up yet. People look up to me, though why I do not know. I am a public figure. I need to be an inspiration! You haven't a clue the pressure that puts on a person!

European Tour Coming Up

The band is getting ready now for our upcoming European tour. I cannot wait to see England again, as I feel as if I have some sort of freakish connection to that country. I can't even imagine why, as I have never been there before our first tour overseas back in 2007. Yet, whenever I go there, I know every town and how far the next town is, though I don't always know the streets.

So, we are starting the tour in England and ending it there before coming back home.

It's been rather nice to be home for these few weeks we've had off (well, not really "off" as musicians never stop working).

On a personal note, I went out to my favorite book and music store to get some more reading material. Edna and Jess always bug me about buying an e-reader or some such gadget, but I really do prefer the old fashioned way of opening a real book and reading it. The smell of paper, the feel of the book's weight and texture in my hands.... I know, I am truly old fashioned.

Most of the books I read are history books, particularly about... you guessed it... England.

I am happy to have Jess back home from her modeling job in Europe (she is very big over there as a model of lingerie)... But she loves to snap photos with her cell phone when I least expect and am least ready. Last night, I was sitting in the day room after a show, munching Chinese food, watching a movie in the buff (good thing I had a sheet over me)... I didn't even know she took this photo! Sneaky isn't she?

Paparazzi and Sex Tapes

As they say down here in the south, I'm angry as a mule with a bur under his tail. What is it with the paparazzi and having to publish ... well, everything. Apparently, a lady fan I was "with" while out on tour videotaped us together... and the media got hold of the tape.... and published pictures from it! Okay, I admit I am quite good at my favorite recreational activity. But I have to keep this from Jess. If she sees this, she'll be the one with the bur under her tail. And I'll be in the dog house.

Yeah, that was a fun night... even though it made it into the media's hands, and I am sure the girl I was with made sure of it... brag about being with a rock star. I have news, girl. You're one in thousands! I won't say her name. Though she showed no respect for my privacy, I will respect hers. Besides, the authorities love to go after rock n rollers. We're all degenerates, you know!

Well, since Jess is still talking to me, she has obviously not seen this. It's on some obscure web site. Stephan was kind enough to point it out to me today.

Well, look at this, it's 2am and the wine is kicking in. I think I'll hit the sack (alone, as Jess is still in Europe). No fans at my house tonight so worries.

On the Road Again...

We had a very crazy day today. We've been on the road less than a week and Bruce is up to his crazy stunts, with Stephan and a member of the orchestra (Bobby) and his body guard as cohorts. This time they chose to play a joke on Cameron, which made me feel better, as it is so often on me!

I think I've mentioned before that Cameron is sort of an enigma, even to us who are closest to him. I mean, I have know this dude ten freaking years and I still don't know if he's gay, straight, into dolls or what! Of course, there's been many practical jokes through the years aimed at getting him to spill the beans. Nothing worked. Stephan is always making comments about whether Cameron even has any junk, ya know. Hah! Living in close proximity to other guys, you tend to see just about everything, every part of them, like it or not... especially when booze or drugs get involved. But Cameron, nope... he never even gets down to so much as his skivvies unless he's in a hotel room alone (and even that's a guess).

So, last night, Bruce, Stephan and gang decided to see for themselves. I was not involved in this one, but caught the "show" in person. I'd had several bottles of wine and was entertaining a couple lady fans in the front lounge of the bus as we were parked behind the venue. We were leaving the same night so once our "entertaining" was over, everyone would be kicked out and we'd head back on the road to the next city. Yeah, we had a "curfew."

About a half hour before we were to take off, Cameron came onto the bus. Stephan had paid some fan, or hooker, I don't know... to play the part. They wanted to see if Cameron would take the bait. As soon as he boarded, she was there. She took his hand and led him into the bowels of the bus. You should have seen the confused look on his face! He hadn't a clue why this strange girl was taking him into the middle of where we were all sitting, entertaining, drinking, partying. Like all of us, he was accustomed to women trying to get his attention, but he must have thought "wow, how bold is this one!"  We were all stifling our laughter. It took some acting to pretend nothing abnormal was going down.

Like I said, it's not unusual for any one of us to grab the attention of the ladies. I don't know why, but for some reason, rock stars are a big turn on for women! Even those that show no interest. And that's Cameron. He just looked confused.

As soon as she had him where she wanted him (where she had been paid and told to take him), She threw her arms around his neck and started kissing him. I swear he turned white as a ghost. Stephan was taping this on his cell phone and Bruce was stifling laughter. I just sat there, one lady on my lap, another beside me, watching and smiling.

I don't know how, but somehow I ended up involved in this prank. The girl in my lap (don't ask me for names, I never remember) slid down and unzipped my jeans. Okaaaay. Wasn't the first time I'd been indiscreet in front of all....!  She started to give me the blow job of the century. I tried to watch what was going on with Cameron, but it was rather difficult to concentrate with her warm lips on me, ya know. But I did see the "hooker" go down on her knees.... she unzipped Cameron's jeans so fast... I've never seen anyone move so fast to get another person un-pants. I don't know if Cameron was in shock or liked it... she actually got his pants down to his knees... all his junk showing... well, at least we know he has junk....before he grabbed his pants, pulled them back up and practically sprinted out of the bus.

What happened after that, I have no clue. I don't care. The pretty lady servicing me did a magnificent job, and my mind was lost by this time. When I came out of my "climax-induced coma" everyone was laughing... not at me, but at what had happened to Cameron. Personally, my mind was more on the fact that I had been completely and utterly satisfied, was drunk ad happy, than on Cameron's dilemma.

The rest is a blur, because I think I stumbled to my bunk and fell asleep (when I woke I was naked from the waist down, so I must have removed my pants at some point, not sure when). But, Cameron was back on the bus and we were moving--all fans and hookers had left.

Today, I got most of the story. I guess Cameron took off, humiliated. Bruce, Mr. Reasonable, took off after him. I haven't got a clue what was said, but Bruce convinced him to come back. Bruce said to him that it was his own fault... I mean, c'mon... we all wanted to be sure we'd been traveling for the last 7 years with a dude and not some hermaphrodite or something. I laughed at the story, and the video Stephan showed me after (which included a few seconds of me getting my thrill on). As long as it doesn't end up on YouTube, I don't care. We're all pretty good at keeping these private moments between us close friends.

Moral to this tale? Cameron is a guy for sure... but what his preferences are, we may never know!

Dazed and Confused

Wow! What happened? I saw the Mirror lady again last night, late. Not sure what time. That always fucks with my brain, so I decided to go out. I drove to Atlanta (yeah, Georgia) and went bar-hopping. This is highly unlike me. I almost always get recognized and end up signing autographs and talking to a bunch of fans rather than just relaxing alone or picking up women anonymously.

And here, I drive my freaking Ferrari out to Atlanta of all places! I ended up at some fancy joint called Halo.

I actually had quite the time. As I sat there, sipping away at a Slippery Nipple, I saw a table with these two pretty ladies staring at me, so I went over. I bought them drinks and sat to chat. After a couple hours, I asked if they wanted to get out of there and they agreed.

I couldn't fit both of them in my car!  I wasn't about to bring them home... too far, and Jess was home. So, I followed them to one of their homes.

Have you ever had wild sex with two women at once? Not my first time, but damn these GA Peaches had talents. They could get into positions I didn't think possible... apparently, they're both dancers...exotic dancers.

Ok... try doing one as the other gets into this wild gymnastic-like position above her friend, so her... not sure I can use the word here.... is in your face! And after, they switched. They put to shame almost all the other women I've been with! They performed moves I didn't think possible. I believe these two read the Kama Sutra... and memorized it!! Add in plenty of booze and weed=perfect night.

Turns out, they did know who I am, but didn't want to make me uncomfortable by mentioning it. I thank them for that! Crazy night. Not sure if they invited me to stay or not, but I fell asleep (or passed out) in the bed and woke to find them on either side of me... Ahhh flesh to flesh! And more fun once we were all awake. Insatiable women are the best! Then, they made me breakfast as well!

Sex, wild sex, and even more sex, plus breakfast. It gets no better than this my friends.

Let's just say Jess was not happy when I arrived home at noon in the same clothes I left in.... I think she suspects. She knew I didn't have band practice last night, so I told her I went to Stephan's for the night. He'll back me up!

I recommend a night like that to all males out there!! It'll cure whatever may ail you. Made me forget all about the Mirror Lady! Bliss, to be able to forget my crazy delusions for a night instead of letting them drag me down as they generally do.

Male Sluts and Rock and Roll

I had a day off today and so I decided to sit and read in front of the fireplace in the library. Usually, I read history books. I like reading about various eras, particularly knights of the 17th century, kings and how they lived. King Ludwig was an interesting fellow to read about, if you ever wish.

Tonight, however, I had a taste for something different. I went to the bookstore and bought a rock biography. Should I say who's it is?  (hint... KISS me)

In any event, Jessica chastised me when I arrived home. "You play rock and roll for a living and now you want to read about it?" She was half kidding of course, I think. At least she smiled, shook her head and walked out of the kitchen, where Edna was making dinner. Shrimp Creole... One of my favorites besides tuna sandwiches.

I disappeared into the library. I don't know what Jess was doing, and really I didn't much care. She's a pretty amazing woman, but she can be a bit....naggy, if that's a word, at times. I mean, I know, ok she was joking... but I really think she was partially serious. What does she give a shit what I read?? Would she rather I came home with "The Whore's Guide to Getting Laid?" hahahahaha

Maybe she thinks reading about 1970's-1980's rock stars' lives will draw me into that drug-induced-fuck-anything world (well, I am kind in the latter stage, but I don't tell her).  But, I was born in 1984, so I sort of consider that "my era." Like someone born in the 60's thinks "Yeah, I was born in the 60's so I'm a hippie"  LOL  (Stephan taught me that... LOL... laughing out loud... what if I am laughing to myself, is it then LTM?)

Anyway, this biography was a pretty simple read so I got through most of it in a few hours' time. I'm a fast reader. At one point, he talks about sex and girls in the 80's... how the band members would have orgies together with several ladies. I can honestly say I have NOT done that. The last thing my boner wants is to see Stephan naked! That would kill it. I mention him only because, as I have mentioned previously, we don't know what Cameron is really... never see him with anyone, not woman nor man... nor cow! After all these years we stopped asking. Music is it for him. Apparently that's what gets him off, and if he has sex with anyone, it's when we are not on tour, that's for sure. Maybe he's gay and doesn't want us to know for fear we'll dump him? Like we care! This is the 21st century for crying out loud!

 Back to the biography. Apparently, women weren't the only thing shared by rock stars back then, but sexual diseases too. This was before the days of AIDS and other nasties, like super bugs and all the crap we worry about today.

Let me tell you something right now... I will NOT fuck anything that comes to me (as was stated a certain rocker back then did... I am sure many did.. seems the 70's and 80's was the "fuck-me" generation). I do have a bit of dignity. I also have a type. Like Jess for example. Brunette, big busted, thin waist, fairly tall (hey, I'm 6 feet, I don't want a shrimp). Also... wear a condom! Damn!! I guess back then men didn't feel it was necessary, or didn't like it. I always do! Ok... most of the time!!! I admit, I have indulged on a whim when I had nothing on me (which is rare). But those are few and far between. To my knowledge, I have no kids out there. And I certainly have no STDs. Yes, I've been checked. I am clean ladies... very clean! *evil laugh*  C'mon down!

Someone please find this gorgeous amazing woman and send her my way!

Long Day, Is it Bedtime yet?

Hello fans.

I went to Stephan's house for what turned out to be a pretty wild Christmas party tonight. As I write this, there is a pretty gal asleep (or should I say, passed out), in my bed upstairs. I met her at the party, which boasted about 300 people! When Stephan throws a party, it is no small affair. Of course we were all there, Bruce and his wife (of course), myself and Adrian. As usual, Adrian came alone.... what's his deal, anyway?

I didn't exactly go there with any expectations, but this very beautiful woman with long flowing dark hair, striking blue eyes and the biggest natural breasts I have ever had my hands on, was there. A friend or fan. I've had too much to drink to remember which.

She introduced herself as Jessica. Pretty name... and I can't believe I remember. 

We both had a bit too much to drink, but since I left the car in the garage and had my limo take me to the party, I didn't have to worry about driving. Long story short, Jessica and I ended up back here in my house. After some crazy sex (which I will keep secret except to say this girl is LIMBER), she passed out but, as usual, I cannot sleep. I need more of that! So, in a few minutes I will go upstairs and see if she is awake! 

Never mind waiting. The thought of her has me needing to head up there now. Later dudes!

My new car and other things

As  sit here alone in this huge house (which seems so much bigger after spending a few days in my parent's modest Cape), I can hear the rain tapping on the windows. I had an interesting time visiting CT over the holiday. I am not sure I will be able to make it up there for Christmas, as the band is going to be very busy recording and getting ready to go on tour.

My new car will be coming Thursday! I'm really excited. She's a beauty!

Yet, for some reason the rain is drawing out my melancholy. I have a glass of sweet red wine sitting here beside me and if I smoked, I would probably be having a cigarette. I quit smoking 5 years ago because it was affecting the quality of my voice. Friends of my family's have died from lung cancer, an absolutely terrible and debilitating way to pass. Though I was never a heavy smoker (ie, never more than a half pack a day). I do on occasion indulge in a "social cigarette."

Tomorrow I have to drive two and a half hours to Bruce's place on the shore and his home studio so we can go over some tracks. I am going to have to get up early and finish the song I have been working on or I will hear it from Bruce.

Well, it's already midnight here on the east coast of the USA, so I think it's time to head off to my beloved bedchamber (I seem to have picked up that word lately and I don't know where it came from. Maybe I read too many history books), get undressed and fall asleep to the pitter patter of rain drops.

I will talk to you soon, my fans and friends. Have a very good evening. I will leave you with a photo of one of my cats.

Black Friday!

They call today "Black Friday." I'm not really sure why. The color black usually refers to a negative presence, like Satan and other evil mythological creatures.. Though, I wear a black stage costume as opposed to my band mates who wear variations of white. I'm the dark, they are the mist.

Anyway, it was a wonderful Thanksgiving with my parents.Until about a half hour ago, when I showered, and then was looking in the mirror to brush my teeth and SHE appeared.  I want to say that I just drank a whole bottle of wine, but that's not what caused this illusion... the wine is because I DID see her! I saw her, I started to drink. Nice thing about this holiday, there's always wine!  Christmas always carries with it spiced Egg Nog.

I don't tell anyone this, but since I do not advertise this blog, I am sure no one will see it. Not right away anyway.

Maybe this is the booze talking... but, I have a confession to make. I think it's called a delusion or hallucination. I have been seeing her in mirrors since I was ... well, I think since I was born. At least that is what it feels like. When you look into a mirror, do you see someone who is not there? Schizophrenia?

Yeah, ok... crazy rock star here. The drink makes me handle it better. Don't over-judge me. People tend to do that. I spend a goodly amount in the company of many people... all types of people. I have earned the right to judge. Yet, I can't say a bad word about my fans. If it were not for them, I wouldn't be where I am now. Yes, I drink. But, what would YOU do if you were delusional from birth and needed to hide it from public view? Is this what they call 'mental illness' or am I "special?"

Anyway, I did no work today. Vacation and all. If it is possible for a musician to NOT work! We always have songs in our head, ideas filtering about in there. I go everywhere with a notepad for writing lyrics that come into my head. I also have a recorder in case I have a tune in mind. Eventually, it becomes a song.

Back to this Black Friday... If you think I will be standing in those stores at the wee hours, just to snag a few bucks' deal, you're crazier than I am. And that is crazy!  ha ha!

Night all!